This past week, my kids and I have been learning about maps in our homeschooling education, so I thought I would explore the ideas of having a moral compass and defining where we are in relation to where we want to be.
Having a moral compass allows us to find ourselves in the chaos that is the world we live in. Your conscience is that little voice inside that alerts you to what is good or bad and tries to keep you operating from a pretty honest and good place. We all have it. I suppose everyone's moral compass may have a different set point, a different true north, but we all have a pretty good idea of what is right and wrong.
The past few weeks I have encountered folks who feel the need to remind me of who they are, where they stand. It's as if their actions are in question so they have to alert me to the fact that they are those things they claim to be. It's ironic how it never occurred to me that they might not be who they are claiming, until their ego starts talking, and I realize ego does not necessarily speak from a place of honesty. Ego is about ego and nothing more.
To me, integrity is about being honest, not only with others, but with oneself as well. Your actions should speak for themselves without any need to draw attention to your good deeds or defining characteristics.
It is not good enough to wander around telling others how "honest" you are or how "hard working" you are, or of all of the good deeds you have done. All of those things are interpreted through ego...your ego. What is real is your action or state of being that speaks for itself without your own commentary.
Have you ever met someone who makes claims on their own character that later turn out to simply not be true? I have found that the more people speak from ego about their own good virtues, the more work they have to dedicate to those things. It's the spirits way of drawing attention to something we wish we had or were but are not quite there yet.
When someone tells me how "honest" they are, immediately a red flag goes up in my mind. Why would they need to tell me that? Shouldn't their actions speak for themselves? Shouldn't everyone be coming from a place of integrity and impeccability with their word? In his book The Four Agrements, don Miguel Ruiz explains impeccability. (Here is a summary of the Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz.)
I wish it were true, that all people were coming from a place of integrity, but it does not appear to be. People live in an illusion that they are one way ( looking through ego eyes) when in fact they are not quite there yet. But it is all good, for when your ego is going on about how "good" you are, this gives you a real opportunity to examine your inner self and find out if indeed these things are true. They can be. There is nothing getting in the way, except for self--ego.
One's word should be impeccable, and should stand for itself. One's actions should also be impeccable and done with the best intentions, with love.
In a spiritual world, there is no need to convince others of your virtues because they should stand out in the integrity of your character.
I cannot think of a single spiritual master who prefaced a talk or good deed with words from his ego. For example, did Jesus (or the Buddha, or the Dalai Lama) walk around telling people what a good man he was, what an honest and kind man he was? Or did his actions explain all of those things and more?
If our ego is drawing attention to personal characteristics, it is time to examine self and define who we want to be and who we want to present to the world and the rest of humanity. And then simply be that. There is no need to go on about it, just do it. Be the person you want to be. Be the person you admire. Be the person your spirit is guiding you toward. Redefine your moral compass. Who says you can't give your compass a tune up and relocate your true north to love, truth, integrity?
Looking at this from another direction, perhaps when we come across someone who tells us who they are, for example, "I am honest," then perhaps this also serves as a mirror so that we can look at them and see how honest we are. Or whatever the claim may be. Everyone and everything has the opportunity to be our teacher. Let us learn from the people and the world around us.
Integrity. Let our moral compasses guide us in the direction of love and kindness and we will always do the right thing. Be impeccable with your word and be true in your actions.
Love to all.
~Rev. Kerry
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